Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Transformers 3: more robot flaws than robot wars
The good news is that Transformers 3 won't just be a cynically thoughtless rehash of the previous two outings designed explicitly to pander to the basest desires of teenage boys. On the basis of the Super Bowl spot, it'll actually go out of its way to answer as many questions as possible. Questions like these ...
Fans of the Transformers franchise will remember that, after a mighty struggle at the end of the last film, the Autobots saw off the deadly threat of the Decepticons, and Shia LaBeouf went back to college. Since then, there's clearly been a downturn. Some cars are on fire, the sky is filled with smoke and cinematographer Amir Mokri has decided to adopt the palette from the last Harry Potter film, where everyone just sat around in a tent looking a bit glum for two and a half hours. Whatever happened, it can't have been too jolly.
Not good. Look at him, all grimy and distraught. "What am I doing here?" he seems to be asking as he looks around at the bleak surroundings. "I'm probably not even going to get to simulate sexual intercourse with my girlfriend on top of the giant robot I've just befriended while some other giant robots watch, like I did in the first film. This sucks."
It's the last one. This is either because the Autobots are still ultimately a race of outsiders, and hiding from humans is the only way that they'll ever truly avoid persecution, or because without several interminable scenes of cars turning into robots, Michael Bay wouldn't have much of a film.
Not good. Look at him, all grimy and distraught. "What am I doing here?" he seems to be asking as he holds his head in his hands "I'm probably not even going to get to urinate on an uptight government official in a confusing and awkward comic interlude, like I did in the first film. This sucks."
It's hard to tell from this one screenshot, but to save time let's just say that the events from Battle: Los Angeles have repeated themselves. The exact events. It might not be true, but we'll save a lot of time and it's not like it actually matters.
Not good. Look at her, all immaculate and clueless. "What am I doing here?" she seems to be asking as a car explodes behind her. "I'm probably being played by a completely different actress with different coloured hair this time. My character might not even be a superfluous, broadly-drawn, offensively objectified sex object with no real purpose whatsoever, like she was in the first two films. This suc... oh, hang on, yes she is. Panic over, everyone."
Doesn't look like it, no. Sorry.
1) What happened between Transformers 2 and Transformers 3?
Fans of the Transformers franchise will remember that, after a mighty struggle at the end of the last film, the Autobots saw off the deadly threat of the Decepticons, and Shia LaBeouf went back to college. Since then, there's clearly been a downturn. Some cars are on fire, the sky is filled with smoke and cinematographer Amir Mokri has decided to adopt the palette from the last Harry Potter film, where everyone just sat around in a tent looking a bit glum for two and a half hours. Whatever happened, it can't have been too jolly.2) How is Shia LaBeouf doing?
Not good. Look at him, all grimy and distraught. "What am I doing here?" he seems to be asking as he looks around at the bleak surroundings. "I'm probably not even going to get to simulate sexual intercourse with my girlfriend on top of the giant robot I've just befriended while some other giant robots watch, like I did in the first film. This sucks."3) After the Autobots saved the world from global calamity in the last film, are they now allowed to parade freely through the streets, or are they still going through the rigmarole of disguising themselves as cars?
It's the last one. This is either because the Autobots are still ultimately a race of outsiders, and hiding from humans is the only way that they'll ever truly avoid persecution, or because without several interminable scenes of cars turning into robots, Michael Bay wouldn't have much of a film.4) What about Bumblebee? How's he doing?
Not good. Look at him, all grimy and distraught. "What am I doing here?" he seems to be asking as he holds his head in his hands "I'm probably not even going to get to urinate on an uptight government official in a confusing and awkward comic interlude, like I did in the first film. This sucks."
5) If the Decepticons were defeated at the end of Transformers 2, then why does everything look so bleak?
It's hard to tell from this one screenshot, but to save time let's just say that the events from Battle: Los Angeles have repeated themselves. The exact events. It might not be true, but we'll save a lot of time and it's not like it actually matters.
6) How is Megan Fox doing?
Not good. Look at her, all immaculate and clueless. "What am I doing here?" she seems to be asking as a car explodes behind her. "I'm probably being played by a completely different actress with different coloured hair this time. My character might not even be a superfluous, broadly-drawn, offensively objectified sex object with no real purpose whatsoever, like she was in the first two films. This suc... oh, hang on, yes she is. Panic over, everyone."
7) Will you be able to tell what's actually going on in the film this time?
Doesn't look like it, no. Sorry.
Transformers 3 Dark of the Moon Original Motion Picture Soundtrack
| 1. Iridescent – Linkin Park 2. Monster – Paramore 3. The Only Hope For Me Is You – My Chemical Romance 4. Faith – Taking Back Sunday 5. The Bottom – Staind 6. Get Thru This – Art Of Dying 7. All That you Are – Goo Goo Dolls 8. Head Above Water – Theory Of A Deadman 9. Set The World On Fire – Black Veil Brides 10. Alive & Awake (Remix) – Skillet 11. Just Got Paid – Mastodon |  |
Transformers 3 Dark of the Moon – Monster by Paramore
'Transformers 3: Dark of the Moon' has amazing visuals, great action and (surprise) awful acting
Psst! Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin were secret agents. The whole space race was nothing more than a cover-up for a covert mission launched by President John F. Kennedy. And there’s some weird — I mean, really weird — creatures hiding out in the former Chernobyl Nuclear Power Plant.
The latest ravings of Art Bell? Hardly: These are plot points in Ehren Kruger’s screenplay for “Transformers 3: Dark of the Moon,” which boldly twists conspiracy theories, science-fiction and some prime Optimus Prime escapades into a yarn that might have seemed more innovative if “X-Men: First Class” hadn’t already pulled off the same trick a few weeks ago.
Still, this installment gets some credit for trying to put a slightly different spin on a concept that’s beginning to lose its novelty value: You can only watch that canary-yellow Camaro reconstruct itself as the hulking automaton known as Bumblebee so many times before you start yawning and asking, “Really? Again?”
So it’s slightly astonishing that one of those transformations midway through “Moon” actually does grab our collective attention.
At the height of a race down a freeway, the speeding car is forced to turn into Bumblebee, leaving driver Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) tumbling through the air, seemingly destined to end up as road kill.
But in a beautifully executed slow-motion sequence, Bumblebee reassembles itself back into a vehicle in mid-flight, saving our man Sam and showing off the skill of the wizards of Industrial Light and Magic that created the film’s fantastic effects.
“Moon” has two faces. The visuals are awesome; the acting, dialogue and attempts at comedy are awful, sometimes to a painful degree (the movie is never funnier than when it tries to be serious). This far down the line, “Transformers” fans should know what to expect.
At least director Michael Bay has made a few adjustments to his usual hyperactive style of quick-cutting and wobbly camerawork, which makes “Moon” feel more like an actual movie and less like a migraine waiting to happen.
It is also one of the few live-action films that truly seems to use 3D to its advantage, unlike “Green Lantern,” “The Last Airbender,” “Clash of the Titans” and “Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides,” in which the supposed enhancement made the movie look dingy or downright unwatchable.
The last hour of “Moon,” a battle royale in downtown Chicago in which the Magnificent Mile is magnificently mutilated by warring Autobots and Decepticons, and Trump Tower ends up looking like the notorious Cabrini-Green complex demonstrates the full power of the 3D format, and it’s often edge-of-the-seat exciting.
The lead-up to that lengthy ‘bot brawl is far less impressive, unfortunately. Bay’s take on shooting action may have changed, but his taste in humor has not, and “Moon” includes jokes and caricatures that would make “Ernest Goes to Camp” or “The Hottie and the Nottie” look classy by comparison.
Sam’s aggravatingly unfunny parents (Kevin Dunn and Julie White) are back, and Ken Jeong, playing a suspicious Chinese business executive, demonstrates once again that his act that seemed wacky and outrageous in the first “Hangover” has gotten very old very quickly.
While dumping the infamous Megan Fox as the series’ heroine might have seemed like a bright idea, replacing her with Rosie Huntington-Whiteley was a major miscalculation. In place of Fox’s tough, feisty Michaela (and don’t think the filmmakers pass up the chance to throw in a few nasty jabs at the long-gone character), there’s Huntington-Whiteley’s blond, vacuous and often whimpering Carly, who exists purely as something to be dragged around by the bad guys or rescued by Sam.
Rosie Huntington-Whiteley plays CarlyCarly is introduced with a shot of her half-bare derriere bouncing up a flight of stairs, which may explain the often bewildered-looking Huntington-Whiteley’s casting.
She certainly doesn’t generate any heat with LaBeouf, who tries to overcompensate for his own blandness by occasionally trying to imitate Tom Cruise’s more manic moments, spitting out lines one on top of each other or straining to hit hysterical heights.
Exactly why LaBeouf has been anointed a movie star is anyone’s guess, but whatever his talents may be they don’t include sharp comic timing. As for Josh Duhamel, Frances McDormand, Patrick Dempsey and John Malkovich, they look appropriately stern, stoic or (in Dempsey and Malkovich’s cases) smarmy and they let the computer-generated stars have the right of way.
At its best, “Moon” has no difficulty delivering the adrenalin rush that disaster movies such as “The Towering Inferno,” “Twister” and the second half of “Titanic” provided, those moments in which you’re simultaneously shocked and yet secretly savoring all the destruction the filmmakers can conjure up.
Shockwave, a sinuous Decepticon that’s sort of like a mechanical version of the dreaded sand worms from “Dune,” is a tremendous creation, and the well-orchestrated war in the Windy City, complete with spiky airships and death rays that blast the flesh off humans, makes up for many of the shortcomings of the film’s first act.
If it’s all a case of spectacle over substance, why should anyone be shocked? After all, it’s basically a $200 million toy commercial, with a few car ads shoehorned in. Anyone who thinks he or she is going to find stirring drama or hard-hitting emotional truths in a “Transformers” flick at this late date must be under the influence of a Decepticon.
The latest ravings of Art Bell? Hardly: These are plot points in Ehren Kruger’s screenplay for “Transformers 3: Dark of the Moon,” which boldly twists conspiracy theories, science-fiction and some prime Optimus Prime escapades into a yarn that might have seemed more innovative if “X-Men: First Class” hadn’t already pulled off the same trick a few weeks ago.
Still, this installment gets some credit for trying to put a slightly different spin on a concept that’s beginning to lose its novelty value: You can only watch that canary-yellow Camaro reconstruct itself as the hulking automaton known as Bumblebee so many times before you start yawning and asking, “Really? Again?”
At the height of a race down a freeway, the speeding car is forced to turn into Bumblebee, leaving driver Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) tumbling through the air, seemingly destined to end up as road kill.
But in a beautifully executed slow-motion sequence, Bumblebee reassembles itself back into a vehicle in mid-flight, saving our man Sam and showing off the skill of the wizards of Industrial Light and Magic that created the film’s fantastic effects.
“Moon” has two faces. The visuals are awesome; the acting, dialogue and attempts at comedy are awful, sometimes to a painful degree (the movie is never funnier than when it tries to be serious). This far down the line, “Transformers” fans should know what to expect.
At least director Michael Bay has made a few adjustments to his usual hyperactive style of quick-cutting and wobbly camerawork, which makes “Moon” feel more like an actual movie and less like a migraine waiting to happen.
It is also one of the few live-action films that truly seems to use 3D to its advantage, unlike “Green Lantern,” “The Last Airbender,” “Clash of the Titans” and “Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides,” in which the supposed enhancement made the movie look dingy or downright unwatchable.
The last hour of “Moon,” a battle royale in downtown Chicago in which the Magnificent Mile is magnificently mutilated by warring Autobots and Decepticons, and Trump Tower ends up looking like the notorious Cabrini-Green complex demonstrates the full power of the 3D format, and it’s often edge-of-the-seat exciting.
The lead-up to that lengthy ‘bot brawl is far less impressive, unfortunately. Bay’s take on shooting action may have changed, but his taste in humor has not, and “Moon” includes jokes and caricatures that would make “Ernest Goes to Camp” or “The Hottie and the Nottie” look classy by comparison.
Sam’s aggravatingly unfunny parents (Kevin Dunn and Julie White) are back, and Ken Jeong, playing a suspicious Chinese business executive, demonstrates once again that his act that seemed wacky and outrageous in the first “Hangover” has gotten very old very quickly.
While dumping the infamous Megan Fox as the series’ heroine might have seemed like a bright idea, replacing her with Rosie Huntington-Whiteley was a major miscalculation. In place of Fox’s tough, feisty Michaela (and don’t think the filmmakers pass up the chance to throw in a few nasty jabs at the long-gone character), there’s Huntington-Whiteley’s blond, vacuous and often whimpering Carly, who exists purely as something to be dragged around by the bad guys or rescued by Sam.
Rosie Huntington-Whiteley plays CarlyShe certainly doesn’t generate any heat with LaBeouf, who tries to overcompensate for his own blandness by occasionally trying to imitate Tom Cruise’s more manic moments, spitting out lines one on top of each other or straining to hit hysterical heights.
Exactly why LaBeouf has been anointed a movie star is anyone’s guess, but whatever his talents may be they don’t include sharp comic timing. As for Josh Duhamel, Frances McDormand, Patrick Dempsey and John Malkovich, they look appropriately stern, stoic or (in Dempsey and Malkovich’s cases) smarmy and they let the computer-generated stars have the right of way.
At its best, “Moon” has no difficulty delivering the adrenalin rush that disaster movies such as “The Towering Inferno,” “Twister” and the second half of “Titanic” provided, those moments in which you’re simultaneously shocked and yet secretly savoring all the destruction the filmmakers can conjure up.
Shockwave, a sinuous Decepticon that’s sort of like a mechanical version of the dreaded sand worms from “Dune,” is a tremendous creation, and the well-orchestrated war in the Windy City, complete with spiky airships and death rays that blast the flesh off humans, makes up for many of the shortcomings of the film’s first act.
If it’s all a case of spectacle over substance, why should anyone be shocked? After all, it’s basically a $200 million toy commercial, with a few car ads shoehorned in. Anyone who thinks he or she is going to find stirring drama or hard-hitting emotional truths in a “Transformers” flick at this late date must be under the influence of a Decepticon.
Film review: Transformers 3: Dark of the moon
- Set your senses to 'stun' mode, as Shia returns to save the Earth, blow things up, get the hot new girl and race to the moon. The latest film in the Transformers series has Shia LaBeouf return as Sam Witwicky, and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley replace Megan Fox as primary love interest, Carly Spencer.
"We were once a peaceful race of intelligent mechanical beings".
Michael Bay was once a good director of talented cast members.
The latest film in the Transformers series has Shia LaBeouf return as Sam Witwicky, and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley replace Megan Fox as primary love interest, Carly Spencer.
When a mystifying event from Earth's past hits up the planet in present day it threatens to bring war that the Transformers alone cannot promise to win.
The movie shifts from the early 60s to present day rather nicely.
Space race
Bay's 60s prologue features Kennedy in the White House, with the suggestion that the space race between the USA and USSR kicked off when both countries detected an unknown vessel that had crashed on the moon. From then on, anticipation builds in present day until full on mayhem ensues.
Action
For action lovers, the third in Michael Bay's series of sci-fi epics does not disappoint.
The Autobots and the Decepticons have some marvellous on screen battles which are enhanced in 3D, there's a spine-tingling action sequence in Chicago which lasts a full hour and the finale is an impressive mix of physical staging, live-action stunt work, location shooting and visual effects.
The sound track is equally promising, if a little Inception-esque, but that's hardly surprising seeing as the score was composed by musical extraordinaire Hans Zimmer.
Along with Zimmer's trademark harmonies, the action scenes are complimented with songs from Linkin Park, Paramore, My Chemical Romance and Staind.
It is the acting ability which fails to transform itself on the big screen. Replacing Fox with a model was a risk which didn't pay off for Bay.
Huntington-Whiteley comes straight from a Victoria's Secret runway - and it shows. Sadly her role incorporates a little more than standing around modelling the latest fashions. Passion and chemistry are forced and faux, so much so that LaBeouf's acting suffers as a result.
Patrick Dempsey is an unconvincing villain, but perhaps that's a little more to do with me unable to associate him with any character aside from McDreamy.
Grey's Anatomy fans beware - you won't be swooning over him in this.
The film is saved by moments of brief comedy, whether it be Witwicky's incessant wailing or Ken Jeong's role as Jerry Wang. Although strikingly similar to his character Chow in The Hangover series, Jeong is more than capable of providing a few chuckles.
Action thrillers will not be let down by this jam-packed film, but those seeking something with a little more substance should look elsewhere.
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Full cast and crew for Transformers: Dark of the Moon (2011)
Directed by | |||
| Michael Bay | |||
Writing credits(WGA) | ||
| Ehren Kruger | (written by) | |
Cast (in alphabetical order)
 | Rosie Huntington-Whiteley | ... | Carly Miller |
 | Shia LaBeouf | ... | Sam Witwicky |
 | Hugo Weaving | ... | Megatron (voice) |
 | Ken Jeong | ... | Jerry |
 | Josh Duhamel | ... | Lt. Colonel William Lennox |
 | Frances McDormand | ... | Charlotte Mearing |
 | Patrick Dempsey | ... | Dylan Gould |
 | John Malkovich | ... | Bruce |
 | Leonard Nimoy | ... | Sentinel Prime (voice) |
 | Tyrese Gibson | ... | Robert Epps |
 | John Turturro | ... | Simmons |
 | Alan Tudyk | ... | Dutch |
 | Peter Cullen | ... | Optimus Prime (voice) |
 | Frank Welker | ... | Soundwave (voice) |
 | Tom Kenny | ... | Wheelie (voice) |
 | James Avery | ... | Silverbolt (voice) |
 | Glenn Morshower | ... | General Morshower |
 | Keiko Agena | ... | Mearing's Aide |
 | Julie White | ... | Judy Witwicky |
 | Kevin Dunn | ... | Ron Witwicky |
 | Charles Adler | ... | Starscream (voice) (as Charlie Andler) |
 | Lester Speight | ... | Epps Team 'Eddie' |
 | Robert Foxworth | ... | Ratchet (voice) |
 | Kym Whitley | ... | Jessica Morgan |
 | Mark Ryan | ... | (voice) |
| Jess Harnell | ... | Ironhide (voice) |
 | Kathleen Gati | ... | Russian Bartender |
 | LaMonica Garrett | ... | General Morshowers Aide |
 | Anthony Azizi | ... | Lt. Sulemani |
 | Elena Kolpachikova | ... | Russian |
 | David Hutchison | ... | Marissa Faireborn's Secret Service Agent |
 | David St. James | ... | NASA scientist |
 | Jack Donner | ... | Jack |
 | Kevin Sizemore | ... | Stevens |
 | Chris Sheffield | ... | Pimply Executive |
 | Lindsey Ginter | ... | NASA Scientist |
 | Brett Stimely | ... | President Kennedy |
 | Markiss McFadden | ... | Baby Face Soldier |
 | Steve Hersack | ... | Lt. Col. NEST Aide. |
 | Darren O'Hare | ... | Berated NASA Scientist |
 | Darcy Leutzinger | ... | SWAT Team Leader |
 | Robert Herrick | ... | Josh |
 | James D. Weston II | ... | Lennox team 'Tuens' |
 | Scott C. Roe | ... | Lennox Team 'Nelson' |
 | Bob Kaye | ... | Secret Service |
 | Michael Loeffelholz | ... | Executive Interviewer |
 | Rob Guzzo | ... | Lennox's Team - Zimmerman |
 | Joel Shock | ... | USN Lt. Brenneman |
 | Denny Torich | ... | Air Force Pilot |
| Annie Hsu | ... | Secretary |
 | Jason Endicott | ... | Mearing's Aide #2 |
 | Matt McVay | ... | Tracking Station Crew |
| Morgan Williams | ... | Chuck |
| Bryan Basil | ... | Club Patron (uncredited) |
 | Nathaniel Best | ... | Military Soldier (uncredited) |
 | Anthony Bonaventura | ... | Accuretta Agent (uncredited) |
| Ryan Buckley | ... | NEST Soldier (uncredited) |
 | Ken Bulcroft | ... | Park Policeman (uncredited) |
 | Michael Daniel Cassady | ... | NASA Launch Tech (1969) (uncredited) |
| Jason Adam Chaffin | ... | Extra (uncredited) |
 | Larry Clarke | ... | NASA Scientist (uncredited) |
| Cameron Comstock | ... | Ukrainian Guard (uncredited) |
 | Jordan Michael Coulson | ... | Scared Police Officer (uncredited) |
 | Thomas Crawford | ... | Black Ops Tech #2 (uncredited) |
| Adam Critchlow | ... | Marine Officer (uncredited) |
 | Andrew Daly | ... | Office Worker (uncredited) |
| John Dezsi | ... | Businessman (uncredited) |
 | Gena Ellis | ... | Downtown Pedestrian (uncredited) |
 | John Farrer | ... | United Nations Delegate (uncredited) |
 | Maile Flanagan | ... | Acuretta Generous Woman (uncredited) |
 | Reese Foster | ... | Accuretta Employee (uncredited) |
| Aaron Garrido | ... | Epps Team 'Mongo' (uncredited) |
| Corin Grant | ... | NEST Soldier (uncredited) |
 | Marie Grujicic-Delage | ... | Russian Lady (uncredited) |
| Terrick Guindy | ... | Welder (uncredited) |
| Niki Haze | ... | Extra (uncredited) |
 | William Haze | ... | FBI agent #2 (uncredited) |
 | Jesse Heiman | ... | Mail Room worker (uncredited) |
 | David Hill | ... | NEST Technician (uncredited) |
 | Jasyn Jefferies | ... | USMC Presidential Guard (uncredited) |
 | Haytham Kandil | ... | Iraqi Rebel (uncredited) |
 | Josh Kelly | ... | Epps Team 'Stone' (uncredited) |
 | Kristoffer Kjornes | ... | Attorney General (uncredited) |
 | Inna Korobkina | ... | Russian Woman (uncredited) |
 | Erik Kowalski | ... | Nest Team Soldier (uncredited) |
 | Scott Krinsky | ... | Accuretta Executive (uncredited) |
 | Joel Lambert | ... | Nest Tech (uncredited) |
 | Scott Levy | ... | USAF Tech Sergeant Allen (uncredited) |
| Brett Lynch | ... | Lennox's Team - Phelps (uncredited) |
| Noelle Lynn | ... | Sam's Neighbor (uncredited) |
 | Taylor McCluskey | ... | Office Employee (uncredited) |
 | Alecia McGill | ... | Mansion Waitress (uncredited) |
 | Ray Mirabal | ... | Ground Crew (uncredited) |
 | Michael Morana | ... | White House Staff (uncredited) |
 | Prida Moreza | ... | Accuretta Copy Machine Employee (uncredited) |
 | Paul D. Morgan | ... | Soldier (uncredited) |
 | Dean Napolitano | ... | FBI Agent (uncredited) |
| Jason Neisewander | ... | Extra (uncredited) |
| Daniel Okeefe | ... | Bully Boy (uncredited) |
 | Michael Palma | ... | Accuretta Employee (uncredited) |
 | Alan Pietruszewski | ... | NASA Mission Controller (1969) (uncredited) |
 | Drew Pillsbury | ... | Secretary of Defense (1962) (uncredited) |
 | Reina Poindexter | ... | Fitzgerald- DC Police (uncredited) |
 | Christina Putnam | ... | Accuretta Employee (uncredited) |
 | Zoran Radanovich | ... | Russian Bouncer (uncredited) |
| Leonard Jonathan Ruebe | ... | NEST Soldier (uncredited) |
 | Michael Saglimbeni | ... | Lt. Colonel - Pentagon (uncredited) |
| Cristofer Sanders | ... | Acuretta Executive (uncredited) |
 | Noah J. Smith | ... | PT Soldier (uncredited) |
 | Robert Paul Taylor | ... | Iraqi Rebel (uncredited) |
 | Stephen Taylor | ... | Evil Mailroom Guy (uncredited) |
 | John Turk | ... | Gateguard #2 (uncredited) |
 | William Waddell Jr. | ... | Extra (uncredited) |
 | Kaitlan Welton | ... | Model / Pretty dinner Date (uncredited) |
| Robert Wetterlund | ... | Military Soldier (uncredited) |
| Paul W Wilson | ... | Ukrainian Guard (uncredited) |
 | Karen E. Wright | ... | Secretary to Head of NASA (uncredited) |
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